Masculinity and Femeninity in Advertisements

Representations of gender in advertisements provide powerful models of behavior to emulate or react against. Masculine images typically convey power, strength, virility, athleticism, and competitiveness whereas feminine images show beauty, submissiveness, nurturance, and cooperation. Such themes appear repeatedly in popular culture and are very evident in advertisements especially.

I will show you how advertisements are the hallmark of gender stereotyping and creating certain images to classify people in.

Firstly, In the figure below, boy is playing with airplanes, soldiers, and wild animals—culturally appropriate toys for males. The message in the ad is actually directed to his parent, presumably his mother since it talks about cleanliness in the kitchen and women have been traditionally been assigned that responsibility. In this day and age, it could be speaking to his father instead—a possibility the ad leaves open. The product itself is to some degree gender-neutral. However, ads in the past have often used boys to show just how messy and dirty things can get.


In most ads nowadays the sexuality of mature women is a central focus. Ads like the one in figure below exaggerate sexuality by the wide-spread posture that the woman assumes. She sits, of course, in a model's pose to display the clothing, shoes, and bag in an eye-catching and provocative manner. Ads must break through the clutter of the competition and draw the reader's attention. The somewhat unusual pose here may serve that purpose, but it also serves to reinforce the idea that women are and must be sexual creatures in order to attract attention. Sexist, if you ask me, but grabs attention.



Compare the pose and facial expression of the man in the following ad with that of the woman just discussed. He is not smiling, and is intensely serious in his demeanor. Stoicism and carefully considered emotional reactions are hallmarks of adult masculinity in the world of advertising.



Ads, therefore are platforms in which the audience are swayed to feel in a certain way. Thank you and have a good day. =)

Check yourself before you wreck yourself.

K.Reshan a/l Kalaarajan
B0801442

masculinity and femeninity in advertisements

intimacy interpersonal relationships

Basically, relationships involve a mixture of personal and interpersonal communication.
It is between a"we" and a "me" orientation.

Children are continually nourished by physical intimacy: being rocked , fed , hugged , and held.

As we grow older. the opportunities for physical intimacy are less regular, but still possible and important.

Other forms of physical intimacy include affectionate hugs, kisses, and even more.

However, the facts clearly bear out that for nearly all men and women there are significant differences between the male and female brain. This means that in most cases, men and women do not behave, feel, think, or respond in the same ways, either on the inside or on the outside.

-The male brain is highly specialized, using specific parts of one hemisphere or the other to accomplish specific tasks.

-The female brain is more diffused and utilizes significant portions of both hemispheres for a variety of tasks.

-Men are able to focus on narrow issues and block out unrelated information and distractions. Women naturally see everyday things from a broader, "big-picture" vantage point.

-Men can narrowly focus their brains on specific tasks or activities for long periods of time without tiring.

-Women are better equipped to divide their attention among multiple activities or tasks.
Men are able to separate information, stimulus, emotions, relationships, etc. into separate compartments in their brains, while women tend to link everything together.

-Men see individual issues with parts of their brain, while women look at the holistic or multiple issues with their whole brain (both hemispheres).

-Men have as much as 20 times more testosterone in their systems than do women. This makes men typically more aggressive, dominant and more narrowly focused on the physical aspects of sex.

-In men, the dominant perceptual sense is vision, which is typically not the case with women. All of a woman's senses are, in some respects, more finely tuned than those of a man.

Choong Chin Choa

B0800939

Listening

so here is a short conversation..

The editor suggested by phone, "Let's meet for lunch.
We'll discuss your writing project then.""How will I know you?"
I asked."Oh,"
she answered, "that's easy. I'll be the tall, skinny blonde."I formed a mental picture. . . but one destined to be short-lived.

For on that Tuesday, when she walked up to greet me, I was glad she spoke first. I wouldn't have identified her from the description. In fact, I'd glanced at her once, then looked elsewhere.

She seemed average height, with light brown hair, and not all that skinny (which, of course, I couldn't mention).
Everybody has similar experiences. Written and spoken descriptions seem even less reliable than weather forecasts and lottery tickets.
We hear, "Great movie--you have to see it!"
We rent the video, then cut it off after ten minutes, muttering, "This movie got an Oscar?"You dislike the "super restaurant" a friend raved about.
To you, prices were too high, servers were slow and rude, and you'd rate the food bland, at best.As a result, we have popularized statements like "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" and "One man's meat is another man's poison."

Communication specialists attribute these diverse interpretations to perception. They explain that each of us has a unique window to the world. Consequently, our viewpoints are truly customized, like a contact lens prescription which works for us, but not for the person standing next to us.

Life experiences shape perception.

A Boston native will laugh at the Atlanta weatherman's "frigid" forecast, when temperatures dip into the 40s. Bostonians wash their cars on those days.
A person's needs alter perception.

You've heard the advice, "Don't go grocery shopping when you're hungry."
You'll buy foods you'd skip when shopping just after a meal. Also, think of driving past a bank sign and seeing the time and temperature flashing alternately.
Running late for an appointment, you're likely to focus on the time.
Heading for the beach, you'll center on the temperature. In either case, the irrelevant numbers might not "register" with you.
If asked, you couldn't repeat them.Gender influences perception.
Often we feel there's no exaggeration in John Gray's title, Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus.
As Gray states, many male/female conflicts don't revolve around issues of right or wrong, just decisions made from opposite vantage points.Certainly economic status alters perception. What, for instance, is your definition of an expensive house? Think back to when your salary was one third or one half of your current income.
Your dollar figure for an expensive home was radically different then, wasn't it?
Throw in how housing prices have escalated in the last twenty years, and you'll note another reason definitions change.Physical characteristics play important roles.
In the sixth grade, I learned that I'm largely colorblind. Maybe the editor I met for lunch really was more of a blonde than I thought. Also, were I shorter in stature, she could have fit the "tall" depiction.


/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Listening is a crucial skill for professional and personal success.
Yet it seems like such a basic skill - we all know how to listen, right?
But although this skill is basic in theory, it's difficult to execute.
Yes, everyone can listen, but how many people can listen well?Why is listening important? First, it shows respect to the speakerSecond, if you listen well, you can learn something

Here are 5 ways to improve your listening skills:

1.

Focus.If you decide that someone is worth listening to, then give the speaker your full attention. Turn away from the computer and set your cell phone to vibrate. We may like to think we can multi-task, but we really can't do it with tasks, and we certainly can't do it with people.

2.
Show that you are listening.Make eye contact, ask relevant questions n avoid checking your watch frequently
3.
For a few minutes, let it be all about the other person.Don't use the time to think about your rebuttal. It's important to remember that the function of listening is to understand what the other person is saying, not necessarily to agree with it.
4.
Read between the lines.Don't just listen to the words - also tune into the non-verbal communications. Watch the other's body language and become aware of the feelings behind the words.
5.
Resist the urge to interrupt.Ah, this is a tough one for many of us, me included.

Choong Chin Choa
B0800939

Mood and Emotion

Every people does have mood and emotion. We experience many types of mood and emotion at different time and place, happy mood(good mood), sad mood(bad mood) and many more. In fact, there are disparities between mood and emotion. Mood is a relatively long lasting, affective or emotional state. Moods differ from simple emotion in that they are less specific, less intense, and less likely to be triggered by a particular stimulus or event.

They make a great difference in communication. No. Communicating influences human's mood and emotion. Actually, it is the concept of chicken-and-egg nature. Our mood and emotion can sway how we communicate with others. To illustrate, when you feel very down, you will not feel like talking to others. In this way, people may mistaken that you are hard to be approached. Another example is when you feel very angry and someone comes to tease you, you might become more angry and probably quarrel with the person. This will ruin your communication and relationship with that person.

Similarly, our mood and emotion can be influenced while we communicate with others. For instance, we are happy for a short moment when someone tells us a humorous joke. The feeling for short moment is our emotion. When more and more incidents make you happy and your happy emotion last for a long time, it becomes good mood.

In a nutshell, we should manage our emotion and mood well so that we will not spoil our communication with other people which will consequently influence our relationship with others.

Reference
1)http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mood_(psychology)

August Rush

Just a movie suggestion. I thought this movie might be related to communication. Basically, this movie is about listening and communicating through music. It's very symbolic. how can we communicate through music? ironic. but this biy does.So,just watch and you'll understand.

Persuasive Speaking

A fine example of persuasive speaking is none other than a good ol' debate session. Recently I was out with my girlfriend when we started to debate if religion, is in fact man made or not. We sat down at that one 'mamak' shop being at loggerheads over this issue. Haha

There are many factors that either improve or mess up the level of persuasion in a person's speech. First off is structural techniques. Format, is very important when it comes to persuading a person. As example, you should choose an outline, a stand, that reaffirms your point and at the same time, relate to the other person you are talking to.

Furthermore, you have to lead your audience, in my case, my girlfriend, with logic. You have to create a series of logic in order for you to fully develop the potential of your argument.

Next, you have the factor of credibility. You need to cite facts and statistics in your argument as this is amongst the points that really hold water. Moreover, you need to document your references or statistics; Never leave your audience to question on where you had your facts from as this would lead them to question your argument all together.

I will try to include a transcript of the future debate between me and my girlfriend. Haha, she's a national debater, so yeah, things do get heated up.

Till then, check yourself before you wreck yourself !

K.Reshan a/l Kalaarajan
B0801442

Lip Reading

Lip reading is a technique of understanding speech by visually interpreting the movements of the lips, face and tongue with information provided by the context, language and any residual hearing. I just finish watching the Hong Kong drama 'Speech of Silence'. The story is about a half deaf girl who knows lip reading. With the aids of audiphone, her hearing ability left about 30%. Her job is to dub for filmmaking. However, after an accident, her ear cannot hear anything. She is totally deaf. At that time, she feels very depress, particularly when she realizes that she is having a great difficulty in dubbing as she cannot hear anything. Sometimes, she even misunderstands the words of other people by using lip reading only. She does not use sign language to communicate with others. Finally, after a period, she successfully adapts herself to the situation. She can go back to her previous firm for the dubbing job.

As you can see, she is a very intelligent and persevere girl. She can use only lip reading to communicate with people around her. Thus, this proves that lip reading is a very useful skill for deaf people to communicate. However, people who have grown up deaf will not be suitable to learn this skill as they have never heard the spoken language. Besides, it needs a very long period of observation combine with hearing in order to be efficient in lip reading.

Actually, people with normal vision and hearing also unconsciously use lips and facial information to interpret words in everyday conversation. It is rather obvious when we cannot hear clearly. Do you realize it? If you do not believe me, you can start to observe yourself and other people when they are hearing or listening to the person who is speaking.

Reference
1)http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lip_reading

Sign Language

Sign language is a language which uses visually transmitted sign patterns(manual communication, body language and lip patterns) to convey meaning- simultaneously combining hand shapes, orientation and movement of the hands, arms or body ,and facial expressions to express fluidly a speaker's thought. [1] It is not just deaf and hard of hearing people who use sign language. People who are dumb are another large segment of sign language users. Other than that, it provides a mean of quick communication, especially for those whose attention spans may be very short or language very limited. They feel more comfortable by using sign language to communicate. Furthermore, it can also be a tool for language development prior to developing spoken language.

Sign language is a very useful tool that aids the disabled as well as their families and friends in communication process. This is a true story of a deaf girl. Before her mother went to learn sign language, they could not communicate at all. However, after her mother knew how to use sign language to communicate with her, all the things changed. Besides solving the problem of did not understand each other, their relationship got better.

Thus, without sign language, it is difficult or impossible for the disabled and people who are around them to communicate well. They will face a lot of problems in their life. Sign language makes their life easier and avoid undesirable accident to happen. Although it is hard to learn sign language, it is worthwhile to learn it when you need to communicate with the disabled.

This is a video that teach you how to use basic sign language.

Reference
1)http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sign_language
2)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7cayMkVidpc
3)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7gSZfW4gVhI

Self disclosure in job interviews

"Self disclosure is the process of deliberately revealing information about onself that is significant and that would be normaly known by others"
In short, self-disclosure is ....sharing information with others that, they would not normally know or discover.
CareerMakers, a professional human resource company that provides seminars for job interviews, graduates reports that learning to tell stories in job interviews is one of the most practical and powerful skills they learn at CareerMakers. Stories have contributed to their success in becoming known to their interviewer (self disclose) and boost up their confidence. During in an interview, the interviewers would asks repeatedly "give me an example of when you have written your company newsletter?". Meaning that, the interveiwer wants you to disclose yourself about your success in your preveious job. "Example = successful stories". They would also asks for specific names, skillls and results as a confirmation that once you have done it successfully in the past, undoubtedly, you can repeat the success again in the future. Events from your life will determine whether or not you have the skills to do the job. Now,what they are trying to say here is, some of us think that we are articulate when we use phrases like "I'm good with people" or " I'm a hardworker" in an interview. The problem with theess statement is that it doesnt come with life events and doesnt come with concrete information that illustrates the skills or trait that proves our claims. All these are disclosed so that the interviewers will have full confidence in us. We disclose our past events to the interviewers.

Mosh Pit

For any lover of the metal genre of music, one would understand that it is almost a tradition to have a mosh pit at a metal gig.

For the newbies, this is what a mosh pit looks like.


Lamb Of God Moshpit

Why why why ?

You see, the act of being in a moshpit, dare i say, is almost a religious one. Inside a moshpit, in a metal gig, everyone transcends as ONE. There is no color, no religion. no hate, to separate us. As example, the lead singer of Killswitch Engage, one of the influential metal bands around, well, is black. Haha

I will explain more about metal and how it has become such an awesome channel for communicating angst and anger further in my blogs to come.

Inside a moshpit, you free your mind, your soul, your worries, and you communicate with your fists and your emotions. Under the influence of heavy metal, adrenalin pumping, we emancipate ourselves and journey into a different realm.


Bullshit? Get yourself into a moshpit, then tell me its bullshit. Haha
Owh, and by the way, Parkway Drive is coming to Malaysia. wOot woOt !

K.Reshan a/l Kalaarajan
B0801442

Postpartum Depression

As the title suggests, Postpartum Depression is another form of depression. But what has it got to do with communication? It impairs the vital mother-infant bond by jeopardizing the communications between them.


You see, the whole process of giving birth is a blessed one. It is a holy event, in which a new life is transcended into this world. But, it is very taxing, for the mother and the child. In which happens to almost 5- 25 % of women, postpartum depression gets the better of the mother.

Has anyone ever wondered why when a baby is born, the baby is always put directly above the mothers chest? This is because its important that the baby is able to detect the mothers heartbeat. This, in its own form, is the first communication between the baby and the mother.

Even in Frederick Leboyer's gentle birthing technique, he states that the sound of the heartbeat gives the baby a sense of familiarity. This is to help the newborn as he stages he's grand entrance into the new world.

For mothers who suffer from postpartum depression, they refuse to talk, to touch, to even be near the newborn baby. This, if not treated properly, could result in massive personality disfigurements to the baby. The mother needs to communicate to the baby through the sense of touch, the sense of sound.

This is feedbacked by the child through the rooting response. The next time someone gives birth, go to the baby and slightly apply little pressure on one cheek of the baby. You will notice that the baby would turn his head towards the area touched with his mouth opened.

This video demonstrates this phenomenon.



Thank you and have a lovely morning.

K.Reshan a/l Kalaarajan
B0801442

Female vs Male

This is a quite funny picture that shows the difference between male and female. Male and female are not only differ in verbal communication but also in non-verbal communication. However, nowadays, it can also happen on the other way round. Therefore, we should know the way female and male communicate to avoid misunderstanding and be a good observer. As a good observer, we can quickly suit our communication style to the person we communicate. Through this, we can become a people magnet.

Reference : http://www.wickedreport.com/images/UnSpokenCommunicationBetweenGirlsandBoys.jpg

The 411 on Perceptions

Alright hold up, look at this picture

What the hell ?

What is that dumb guy doing in the way of the truck ?

Wow, my hero...

Revolution starts with absolution brahhh !!!!

Fight for your rights !!

Uhmm, your kinda in our way dude ?

By the way, the picture above was the 'Unknown Rebel' who stood up against oppression in Tianamen Square ~ google it


On the above in red are all probably the different things that different individuals would say to this picture. This is caused solely by different perceptions.

Defined by our Human Communications textbook, it is an act of noticing, interpreting and organizing data about people, events, activities and situation. But psychologically speaking, is the process of attaining awareness or understanding of sensory information.

Its not really as simple as it seems it is; as there are actually a lot of components involved in the formation of perception. What one perceives is a result of interplays between past experiences, one’s culture and the interpretation of the perceived.

So you see, with someone from a different culture, someone with no past experience of being oppressed or anything as such, they would not understand the deed done by this individual and therefore, would perceive it as something stupid or not of importance.

On the other hand, if you were there at Tianamen Square, you would have understood it. Maybe this was what the guys from System of a Down were trying to convey to us in their song, Hypnotize.

To give you a better grasp on the issue of perception, observe this picture,




A little info on the picture. This picture was taken in 1994 during the Sudan famine. The picture shows a starved, deprived child crawling towards a United Nations food camp, located a kilometer away.

IMO, the vulture is stalking the child, waiting patiently for it to die so it can eat it. This picture, shocked the whole world. Kevin Carter was the photographer who took this picture. At that time, photographers were not allowed to touch their subjects as fear of the transmission of diseases. No one knows what had happened to this child.

In the same year, Kevin Carter won the Pulitzer Prize Awards for this picture.
3 months later, he committed suicide due to depression.

Touching? Your perception.

K.Reshan a/l Kalaarajan
B0801442

Nonverbalcommunication

According to experts, a substantial portion of our communication is nonverbal. Everyday , we respond to thousands on nonverbal cues and behaviors including postures, facial expression, eye gaze , gestures , and tone of voice. From our handshakes to our hairstyles, nonverbal details reveal who we are and impact how we relate to other people.

there are types of nonverbal communication. in my opinion. i think the most important is:

Appearance

Because the choice of colour, clothing, hairstyles, and other factors affecting appearance are also considered a means of nonverbal communication. Research on colour psychology has demonstrated that different colour can invoke different moods. Appearance can also alter physiological reactions, judgement , and interpretations.

For Example:

Assume that they applied for manager in your company will you hired him/her?

by Choong Chin Choa

Perception

Perception to me is ones thoughts towards something or someone. Perception defined in Human Communication as noticing, interpreting and organizing data about people, events, activities and situation while in Psychology perception is the process of attaining awareness or understanding of sensory information which pretty much means the same thing.



we always consciously or subconsciously have perception towards or about other people.
since we have perception day in day out. You know there would be factors that would influence these perception which includes our own narratives, perceptual tendencies, situational factor,culture and ones ability and willingness to empathize.(according to syllabus)
Other factors that influences ones perception: (Some might be similar to the one stated above)

• Previous learning and experiences.
• Attitude and interest.
• Needs and feelings
• Current Situation.
• Socio-economics(occupation, level of education, environmental factors)
• Personal Differences(age, gender ,race)
• Cultural Differences(customs, believes, historical perspective)

we had a game called human cluedo. we had to interview them and find out who killed the wife and their personalities.

why?well,different characters came up with different stories. Perception is a process of noticing, organising and interpreting data about people, events, activities and situation.

For Example,

man`s body with tattoos, he is more likely to be a thug, gangster, mafia and etc etc etc..

Or if someone ride a motorcycle with all kinda of street skills, he is more likely to be mat rempit. mat "Ah Fong"(means crazy in chinese) or etc etc etc...

BUT,

Man`s with tattoos may assume that tattoos is type of body art or some moments in his life he wants to remember and cherish(have to watch miami ink).

It could be filming movie or records a video and send to The World Most Amazing Video to win some cash.

Music is obviously another way to express their feelings towards something or someone. but how often could you relate yourself to music that has no words in the song at all?

We all experience non verbal communication in our daily lives. But what if i told you that there was a community of people who use drums, and drums only to communicate to others ?

And no, this aint some African Tribe.








The Community Drum Circle is a community based event where drums and rhythms are the cornerstones of their organizations. It is a noisy, yet fun, family based event.They empower each other in the act of celebrating community and life through rhythm and music.


Not these drums


More like these

People of all levels of musical expertise come together and share their rhythmical spirit with whatever drums and percussion they bring to the event. Everyone who comes and participates has something to offer the circle, and any one is welcome.

This community bases its messages, almost unilaterally, through rhythm and rhythm only. Gabriel Roth, of the Community Drums Circle, says that

The spirit and magic of rhythm expressed on drums and percussion instruments cuts through all ages, sexes, religions, races and cultures.

What members of the Drum Circle do is that they collaborately create an event where they come together as a community, to drum their rhythms of life, and changes relationships in the form of positive energy. And this is all achieved via drums. The release as well as the healing is very different for everyone but the main goal of a unified community is achieved.

The quality of the music produced in an event like this is not based on the rhythmical expertise of the players, but on the quality of their relationship with the other people in the circle. The result is those magical musical moments where one powerful voice is created out of the many. In those moments, the players stop worrying about keeping time because time, as they know it, has stopped. In its place is a living breathing entity, expressing timeless joy, passion and release through the power of rhythm.

This people, is the beauty of a community drum circle.

This also comes to show that music and rhythm is a powerful means of non verbal communication.

Drums, non verbal communication? Almost reminds me of Hitler.
See, what Adolf Hitler used to do was to assemble all his troops to the haunting, repetitive, sounds of drums pounding until he had a whole cavalry of mindless robots willing to further his goal of Nazi superiority. See how powerful is the power of rhythm?

Until then, check yourself before you wreck yourself!

K.Reshan a/l Kalaarajan

B0801442

Cues

I was in a train when i saw this ads.Straight it reminds me of paralanguague. When we mention about non verbal communication(NVB), we are most likely to think of movements,body gestures,facial expressions and etc. But we'd(at least i am) never thought that spoken words(even written) are also Non verbal cues. Then it got me thinking about Glen's example on paralanguage( the example on fatin's distinguish look). This is the latest commercial from Bonuslink regarding on e-wallet or something similar to that about paying bills through cellphones(it doesn't matter). Now if you see the tagline says " WE PAY ALL YOUR BILLS". They are using paralanguage in their ads by higlighting the word "all" to give the spotlight on it with underlying meaning that all bills can be paid through this service..electric,phone bills, house loan and etc. I guess bonuslink has done a very good job, they caught my eyes.Sarcasm is one way of how we use paralanguage, perfectly with voice tone to emphasize even if it has been said with literal meaning (its one thing that im good at). For instance, once during Legal studies tutorial, we were asked to introduce ourself (with the age and all) and one of the students was hesitating to inform her age simply because she thought that she was the oldest in the class (she is 20 years old) and then, Jac chimed in and said " dont worry, Vick is older than you. he's 22" and Vick spontaneously replied "oh,thank you jac". He just knows how to be sarcastic. And just now i was watching Evan Almighty on Starmovies, i laughed my guts out when Evan said thanks for sharing after a bird pooped on his shoulder. That's one way to put it.

Another instance is when we're upset or frustrated. We say things like "i see", "right.." or anything when the other communicator said something that is in deed very long and we just give them a short reply to indicate that i am uber pissed off /frustrated. Sometimes we use it to show that we are not interested to communicate with them. Also, voice tone can tell you about yourself,your personlaity. Whether you are a confident or someone with low self esteem and etc. Even handshakes can tell your personality...partially. Thus, handshakes is important during interviews to maintain the good first impression. Again, this emphasis that first impression is important. Bear in mind that if you are about to hit on a girl, please maintain a good impression. There was this dude i saw at the train station, i can see that he was staring at me even he was standing 10 feet away from me. While i was at the counter, buying the train ticket, without hesitating, he came and stand near(beside) me. It was close enough to make me feel extremely uncomfortable. Proxemics(distance) is a very important element of communication. Instead of drawing my attention, this dude actually freaked me out. Now, gentlements, that is not the way to tackle a girl. Do that more often and you are most likely wont get any girl.




Yawning sometimes indicates " boring..."
(other than the fact the our brain is lacked of oxygen)

Eye Movement and Lying

Lying seems like has become an indispensable part of our life. Research done by Bella DePaulo, Ph.D., a psychologist at the University of Virginia shows that most people lie once or twice a day. This result did not include the mindless pleasantries. Why do we tell lie? Of course, there are thousands of pretext that we can reason out to defend ourselves. However, sometimes we lie so that we will not hurt other people 's feelings which can also called white lie. In DePaulo's study, it also revealed that "false positive" lie (white lie) are about 10 to 20 times more frequent than "fake negative" lie.

The study, again, proved that men and women communicate in different ways. According to the research, men are more likely to lie about themselves. In contrast, women are prone to lie to protect other's feeling. Other than that, women generally have a better skill in figure out who is the deceiver and deceive others. On the other hand, men are on the other way round.

Well, what we concern when discussing the topic of lying is how can we know who is lying and who is not? Below is a some eye movement clues that you can look out when judging whether a person is lying to you. However, this may not be true for everyone and only investigate eye movement is not enough for making a conclusion.

Visual Accessing Cues

When asked a question a "normally organized" right-handed person looks (from your viewpoint, looking at them):

Up and to the Left
Indicates: Visually Constructed Images (Vc)
If you asked someone to "Imagine a purple buffalo", this would be the direction their eyes moved in while thinking about the question as they "Visually Constructed" a purple buffalo in their mind.

Up and to the Right
Indicates: Visually Remembered Images (Vr)
If you asked someone to "What color was the first house you lived in?", this would be the direction their eyes moved in while thinking about the question as they "Visually Remembered" the color of their childhood home.

To the Left
Indicates: Auditory Constructed (Ac)
If you asked someone to "Try and create the highest the sound of the pitch possible in your head", this would be the direction their eyes moved in while thinking about the question as they "Auditorily Constructed" this this sound that they have never heard of.

To the Right
Indicates: Auditory Remembered (Ar)
If you asked someone to "Remember what their mother's voice sounds like ", this would be the direction their eyes moved in while thinking about the question as they "Auditorily Remembered " this sound.

Down and to the Left
Indicates: Feeling / Kinesthetic (F)
If you asked someone to "Can you remember the smell of a campfire? ", this would be the direction their eyes moved in while thinking about the question as they used recalled a smell, feeling, or taste.

Down and To the Right
Indicates: Internal Dialog (Ai)
This is the direction of someone eyes as they "talk to themselves".

Reference:

http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/index.php?term=19970501-000033&page=2
http://www.blifaloo.com/info/lies_eyes.php

The Power of Language

It is indisputable that language makes big influence and difference in verbal communication. Just take an incident that happened two days ago as an example.

I had lent my friend, X my rice cooker and a bowl about one week ago. Besides borrowed my utensils, X also borrowed a plate from my roommate and a tin opener from my friend who is staying beside my room. One important thing to note is X is not borrowed the stuff for himself, but for his friends. X always helps his friends (the same friends) borrow things from my group of friends. However, this is not the thing that we care. The thing that matter (a little bit only) is X did not tell us that the things that he borrowed are for his friends. At this moment, you must be wondering how we knew it. The answer is sometimes the person who returned the things to us was X’s friend, and occasionally, he told my roommate he is borrowing the things for his friends. (After borrowing the things)

To be honest, we do not like one of X’s friend as she is very arrogant and does not say ‘hi’ to us although we have been in the same class and often see each other in college and hostel. She did not reply ‘hi’ or smile to us even when we said ‘hi’ to her. Nevertheless, she did notify others who she considered intelligent. Such a bigheaded person… (X does not know that we are not very happy with the girl) Although we are not very happy with her, this will not stop us from lending her things. We are not such stingy people.

When X borrowed the stuff, he did not tell us when he will return the things to us. At the night which X borrowed the stuff, my roommate sms X and asked him when he will return the stuff to us as one of the things he borrowed was belonged to my friend who stays beside my room. As we are not very close to the friend, it is not good to borrow her thing for a long period although we had told her it is borrowed for another friend. Back to the sms, he replied “later”. However, he did not return the stuff. My roommate had sms X several times after that day regarding this matter to ask him when he will return those things. Nevertheless, the same results turned out. X broke all his promises, so I do not have a good impression on him already.

On last Thursday, X, finally returned the stuff to us when I was on the way home to my hometown. Among the stuff that X returned to us, there were extra spoons which were not belonging to us. In order to make sure those are not my spoons, my roommate sms me. The sms is like this: “You did not borrow any spoon from X?” Then I was confused. I spoke to myself: “Har? Is there any error in this message?” However, I was a little bit annoyed. So, I replied her with this message: “Who want to borrow his spoon wor? I also have many spoons la. No. He said I borrowed from him?” At last, she said she had made an error in that message. It should be: “X did not borrow any spoon from you?”

From this, we can see that how language makes a huge impact in communication especially when my roommate made the syntactic error in the usage of ‘borrow’ and ‘lend’. Besides, it is obvious that ‘No single person or event causes another’s reaction’. Communication is a process. The things that annoyed me were not the message only, but all those things that linked together. Furthermore, intrapersonal and dyadic communications occurred when I spoke to myself and the communication between my roommate and me.